Wednesday

to be a fraud and still keep going

I was reading on Amazon about a book on gentle parenting, simple living and whole foods and
one of the reviews was incredibly negative, saying something like, I am this lady's neighbor and
she doesn't practice what she preaches.  Don't read this book, don't listen to her, she's a fraud.

It just made me sad.  Because you know what?
Dear friends, I am a fraud too.
I write here of peace, of beauty, of simplicity,
gentle parenting,
whole life learning, living and faith.
I write of what I believe, of what I know to be true and
I write, hoping to encourage some of you.
 

I write ideals and principles that I try to live by.
But.
I fail.
Often.
Does that make my heart any less passionate?
I know gentle parenting to be true and good,
knowing God, I believe it to adhere to His love and parenting of us.
I write all I can about it,
I promote it,
I tell stories of when grace flows through our home,
our parenting, of when
repentance and love harmonize.
And yet,
too often I resort to yelling.
Too often my resolve is squashed by my impatience,
my selfishness,
and I find myself doing that which I do not want to do.
Too often.



So if you were to meet me,
to spend any amount of time with me,
to live next door to me,
you would probably call me a fraud and
announce to others not to listen to my words.
That is, if you were judging me based on my numerous failings.
 

But I still believe that God is good,
that a simple life is a life well lived,
that compassion, peace, grace, mercy and gentleness need to reign in
our lives, our marriages, in our parenting.
I still believe it.
And I will constantly strive to live it.
And I will often fail but not give up.
For, like Paul,
who wrote epistles filled with what is good and how to live and yet
still called himself the chief of all sinners,
I will write what I know
but I can't live up to it.
Not always. Not usually.
But I'll keep on.


And if you show up at my door and I am speaking too harshly
you can either call me a fraud or
remember that life happens,
that we all fall short
and encourage me to move forward just as
I hope to encourage you.




9 comments:

  1. Dear Amay
    We are all in your shoes at some time of our Lifes. It is a good place to be for then we learn that we do not have what it takes to be the person we would like to be and reach out in full dependance of our God?
    Blessings x
    Mia

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  2. sometimes I think you're way too hard on yourself, having met you and your family in real life, I didn't find a single thing fraud-ish about you.
    Good for you for being so gracious towards the author. It made me wonder what she did to her neighbor to cause her such rife. I mean, holy cats, who makes time to vent neighbor drama on Amazon? I know one thing for sure, you're the type that neighbors love. You're Mr. Rogers neighborly and I doubt anyone would write mean things about you

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  3. I can't imagine saying something like that on an open forum about anyone... it is wrong and pointless.
    I do like your blog and I like the fact that you along with all the rest of us are normal and we do fall and then we get up and start again. That my friend is called Grace.
    Hopefully the lady who left a 'not so nice' comment will decide to remove it. It is wrong.

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  4. I can so relate to this. Totally and completely.

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  5. Love you, Amy. We all fail. But I read a quote twice yesterday in different places(so I paid attention:) that said that sometimes courage is the "quiet voice at the end of the day saying I will try again tomorrow." That is what we do, and that does not make you a fraud. It makes you human. You are a beautiful spirit.

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  6. Amy,

    This is truth and is gentle healing encouragement. Thanks, friend. Me too. :)

    Hopping over from Emily's link up.

    Jennifer Dougan
    www.jenniferdougan.com

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  7. Agreed.
    If we all waited until we were perfect in an area, no books would be written.
    We can encourage each other onward and upward.
    Learn from each others missteps.

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  8. (((Amy))) I could have written this post, although not half as eloquently :)
    I also strive to live my beliefs and often, so often fall short. But I know that God is good and He knows my heart and my efforts to be true despite all my imperfection.
    Your words inspire me so often and I encourage me always in their warm honesty!
    xx

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  9. Beautiful writing and I relate to it so well.

    I found you on Instagram and I look forward to following you more. I'm a new homeschooler and your photography depicting your homeschooling is inspiring.

    I would love it if you could link up to The Sunday Parenting Party on my blog The Golden Gleam,

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