Thursday

to survive {aka finding peace on a toilet}

home crowded with children playing
loudly
taking a reprieve from the overwhelming heat
and so many voices;
laughing, chatting, reading and
that heat and 
where can a mama with a house
full of seven lively kiddos
disappear for just a moment
to regain, refocus, simply breathe?
where can she go to find peace,
to know she will survive?

i find myself behind closed door,
in the one place i can {occasionally} expect
to be alone,
the bathroom, and breathe
prayers,
yearning for peace, for cool weather, for
motivation to
do
anything and with hands over eyes i
sink onto closed toilet lid,
breathing,
praying,
and eyes open i
see it.
it takes only a second for my
strained lips to embrace smile and
my breath prayers to turn
to quiet chuckles and then to
outright laughter and
a knock comes,
"mama, what are you doing?" and
children are at door questioning my
sanity and i let them in.

they, looking marvelously confused,
beg me for answers and when
i finally calm the laughter down i let
them in to this world of real bathroom humor,
explaining that i came to the bathroom to
find peace,
i came to find the peace which would
help me survive and
as i sat on the toilet i found it,
a survival kit.
opening eyes from scattered prayers,
this real survival kit was looking right up at me...

a bible,
a pancake and
nunchucks.
everything one needs to survive.

and they laughed with me now,
these children who unintentionally made this survival kit,
and i could breathe again and
i could handle the heat and
i could hug little bodies and
kiss foreheads and
clean house and
{even} cook in the sweltering kitchen.
because i would survive.
and i had the kit to help me along.

 **anyone notice the verse next to the nunchuck? "from this we know the end of the world has come..."  see...this survival kit is perfect for surviving crazy hot days AND the {zombie?} apocalypse.  ha!**


2 comments:

  1. Oh, dear. Heat's really getting to you, huh? :) But I'm so happy that you're finding humor in it all.

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  2. Love this Amy :)
    Made me smile. The bathroom is about the only place I get alone time too :) Except it's not true, Nola usually follows me in or knocks on the door till I open it :)
    xx

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