Friday

to open mouth, insert foot aka to be a hypocrite

so i wrote this post,
poetry,
the kind that makes you breathe in deep,
all about the little ones,
the ones who are gifted to us,
the ones who pull on our clothes and
ask a million questions,
who yell when we need quiet and
need a drink
thirty times
in the middle of the night.
it was all about patience,
gratitude and
embracing every. single. moment.

and the kicker?
the line in bold?
"embrace every moment for
you will never get them back."

and then it happened.
i was just finding photos, editing and
adding finishing touches.
a little voice began whining by my side,
"mama,"
pulling at my arm,
"mama, come see."
and i was just finishing,
almost done and
i told her,
hold on, just a second.
and she waited
for about ten seconds and then
"mama, come on,
come see what i did!" and
then
i snapped at her,
i said hold on!,
way. too. harshly.
and then i looked at her face,
frowning,
what was just a second ago shining eagerness
and joy was now
struck down and
sorrowful.


she turned and walked
slowly
away.
with regret and a basketball sized lump
in my throat i turned back to the screen
and my eyes fell right on
my own words,
"embrace every moment for
you will never get them back."


tears welled,
i,
hypocrite extraordinaire,
went and found her,
grabbed her tight and repented
endlessly.
i saw what she had made,
the picture she had drawn
for me,
and i walked back with head hanging low,
filled with shame
and erased.
i would not post hypocritical words.
i would post truth instead.
here you go.

i know it to be true,
even more so now,
embrace every moment for
you will never get them back."



6 comments:

  1. Been there. Done that. Will likely do it again, sending me back time and again to the fountain of grace.

    And no. We don't get the moments back. But they can be redeemed. Because God is just that gracious.

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  2. I know Amy, I know :)
    You are an AMAZING mother.

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  3. um. JOIN THE CLUB! And sadly I have a feeling I get snappy way more often than you do. So do you have any tips for keeping things in perspective and your tongue in check? Cause I need help girl.

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  4. wow... we all have been there. I do daycare with an almost three year old and she has the deepest brown eyes and when I say 'in a minute' she gives me a big sigh and waits as patient as her little two year old soul can wait. sometimes the moments JUST don't come back.

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  5. yes. and isn't it wonderful that they are so good at forgiving us?

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