to chronicle a day...

*a bit different from my typical prose, but i have been asked by various people about our homeschool, and so i will share here about our day...*

three children formally schooling,
three littles roaming the floor at our feet...

we have found our niche and a way of life
using the charlotte mason method,
and the ambleside online curriculum.

our eldest is in the second term of year 9,
thoroughly  convinced he knows more than most people,
due to the depth of the books he is reading
while dear 8 year old bookworm daughter is in the second term of year 2,
though she would devour the books rapidly  and already be
through year 12,
if she had it her way
sensitive artist child, 6, has just begun term 1 of year 1,
and pleads to read An Island Story,
and nothing but,
day in and day out...

our days begin before the sun rises,
the three littlest and i awaken
while daddy is getting ready for work...

i make his lunch
while littles play
and he enjoys the early morning fun of
his youngest children.

kisses goodbye from daddy/husband,
cereal poured for twins
(horrible, awful cereal, yes, shhh...,
i feed it to my children, and sometimes even...
to myself...)

meals are typically shared together
around the table where we make memories,
i have yet to organize that first meal of the day,
it is a wild free for all,
eat what and when you want,
as long as you do it by 7:30...

mama sips on that delicious brew known as coffee
(otherwise known as christian crack,  oops, did i say that?),
and drinks in God's word,
strength for the day,
until little big man gets grumpy,
and i nurse him,
love flowing from me to him,
and he drifts off to his sleepy land,
all before the eldest three
arise by 7:00...

breakfast is eaten,
children are groomed and dressed,
although the three year old twins occasionally lose their clothes,
dishes are done,
house is clean,
and 8:00 comes before we know it...

15 year old reads his Bible,
while i attempt to get everyone else settled...

ideally i begin circle time with 8, 6, and on a good day,
3 year olds
now, but,
let's be honest,
that doesn't happen very often.

bookworm daughter does her cursive,
fifteen year old finishes Bible,
moves quickly into
language arts...

sensitive artist child
has copywork,
and then draws a picture
that corresponds,

all while twins are playing...
"reading" books...

somewhere in that time,
circle time begins...
bible reading,
memory work,
artist study,
composer study,

we get it done, somehow,
and the children love it,
though interruptions are very, very frequent.

we have made it to lunch time!
and what a wonderful time it is...
eldest or i make it,
we all eat it,
twins go down for a nap,
while baby is snoozing in another of his own.

our ambleside reading begins...
for the eldest,
his selections include a tale of two cities, the english constitution, common sense,
churchill's history of the english speaking peoples, essay on man, the god who is there,
among many delightful others
bookworm daughter is taken to another place
with her books,
an island story, this country of ours, the little duke, the wind in the willows,
tree in the trail, beautiful stories from shakespeare
those are just a taste
while young artist
listens intently to me read
an island story, paddle to the sea, just so stories, aesop's fables, fifty famous stories retold,
and more...

15 and 8 year old read on their own,
6 year old reads to me from the 2nd mcguffey's reader,
and then i read his ambleside readings to him
and, of course, he narrates...
8 year old narrates all to me,
though she occasionally writes or draws...

15 year old narrates one reading orally,
then he has three written narrations,
one summary,
one creative,
one notes...

he has a specific essay to write once a week,
and latin twice a week...

now we arrive at around 2:30,
all sleepers are awake,
we tidy up loose ends of our lessons,
chores are done,
free time is upon us...

outside play,
nature study,
outside, outside, not in...
except occasionally in...

dinner is made,
we eat,
get ready for bed,
we read,
watch an occasional show or movie,
read to the kids,
some nights we have family Bible studies,
some we have guests,
we take night walks,
we love to watch the sunset,

it's chaotic, yet peaceful,
totally unpredictable,
and totally relaxing...

and i must add that all this is done
with loads of interruptions from the three littles...
and we all happily take turns playing,
and helping them...

and that's about all,
dinner's about ready to come out of the oven,
night is about ready to fall,
children are soon to be called indoors
and tonight's activity is a trip to grandma's...


to stand

he's just starting to stand,
and inevitably he wobbles and falls,
as i fall,
broken and bruised
and my weak self,
longs to stay there,
but he is youngest of six, strong baby
and he climbs back up again,
not even weary of the last fall,
he trusts it will be okay,
and i am stained but grace covered mama,
desperate to push aside remembrance of the last fall,
to trust Him to sustain me...

and together we stand again,
yet standing.

linking with emily today...



to celebrate life

Drenched in God's love by the news
the day we learned I would carry His child,
that He chose us to cherish,
a new one, at the time the fourth...

And he looked at me with devotion,
the woman carrying his baby,
another life to fill his,
another child...

weeks flew by,
and he pampered me
and smiled when he saw me,
and rubbed my stomach which was soon to swell with love,
holding hands as if it were the first,
we walked into the doctor's office,
in awe of the journey ahead of us...

they performed an ultrasound as a pregnancy confirmation,
and i wasn't going to complain,
any chance to see the life growing within,
no matter how small,
even just the blinking dot our baby was then,
in the first weeks of life...

"there's a heart, do you see dot's baby's heartbeat."

and we stared at the dot,
the precious dot,
thanking God for the dot,
our baby...

and in silence came fear...
"do you see what I see?"

I answer quickly,
"I see the heart"

now directed towards my husband,
"do you see what I see?"

and his response,
"I don't know, what do you see?"

"Two heartbeats."

and my husband quickly asks,
"my baby has two hearts?"

and then it slowly dawns on me...

two of them,
precious, beautiful girls,
Ruth Annabelle
Hannah Bee
born September 28, 2007

they are such a light in our lives,
thank You Jesus...

107 our twins turning three!

108 the joy they bring us

109 the patience we have learned because of them

110 leaves beginning to change

111 chili, corn bread and apple pie... my favorite things to make in autumn

112 God's sovereignty

113 the hope of a possible move

114 the kindness of strangers

joining with ann, counting my gifts...

holy experience


To awaken

To awaken from this self-induced coma,
to crawl out from this shell which I hid under,
alone with my thoughts,
my prayers,
my hopes...

when hopes entangle us in a land of false reality,
always waiting for fulfillment to come,
not able to live in the moment,
dreaming of that which may be,
but may not be...

and my eyes have been glued to house listings
on computer screens
while beautiful children play behind me,
their sing song voices and delightful laughter
calling to me,
but my shell is hard over me
and i can't look away,
i just might find the one...
the place to call home,
away from here,
there where i want to be... 

my home, and i knew if i visited i would no longer be content here...
but the kids giggle and play,
and crack my shell,
and I see their angelic faces
and remember the words which I must hold fast to,
to be content, whatever the circumstances...

even if here we remain,
or if we move to my home, the place I love,
or if God has another land for us to call home,
if the cupboard is full,
if it is empty,
when the sun shines down,
and when the sky showers us with rain...
to be content

and I may not live in my earthly paradise,
I may be away from friends and family,
but I have a husband that loves me without question,
and six beautiful faces that smile at me and make my heart swoon
like a little school girl with her first crush...
and I look out the window at the rain pouring down,
and remember,
"God's in His heaven, all's right with the world."  -Robert Browning


to say hi!

Sorry to all my friends for being so silent this week...
we have been diligently praying about moving...
vacationing at home left an empty place,
a desire to return to my hometown...

lots going on in my mind,
in my husband's...
no clear answer yet,
but thus the reason for my silence...

i wanted to post something though, and link with emily's imperfect prose...

so i am linking this old post of mine...

love you all!

To make my way home

I watched the sunflowers along the way
from the 5 in Northern California,
beginning as soon as we left
the majestic beauty of Shasta County

down the 5, past bad memory land of sacramento,
patches of sunflowers lining the highway,
and they didn't stop,
three hours later,
followed by yellow love,
now on the 41,
and they were still there.

getting stuffy in the car,
longing for air, for freedom,
and i look out my window
and they're still there...
every where,

as if they have taken over the california highways...

and i imagine a car of granola kids,
driving the length of california
sprinkling sunflower seeds out the window
as they go...

and when they reach shasta county,
they stop,
in awe of the immense forests of trees,
mt. shasta,
the serene creek running throughout,
they decide no added beauty is needed here...

My husband laughs when I tell him my story,
where I think the sunflowers came from...
I tell him the california poppy should not be the state flower,
it should be the sunflower...
he smiles...

we drive on,
I watch them out the window,
a constant companion on this drive,
a delightful companion...

and I am just a broken person trying to make my way home,
in more ways than one,
looking for beauty wherever I can find it along the way...

linking with emily today...

To make memories of beauty

He drives for hours, 
through crying,
through laughing,
with sleeping,
and playing,
and breakdowns of car- exhausted children...


and times come when mama can't stand it,
hours away from anything like home ,
but just wanting to drop it all and leave the car 
and stay there...
who knows where...
make a life here because at least then we won't have to drive anymore...

and he smiles,
hugs her,
reminds her that it's okay when babies cry,
we'll get there eventually,
let's just enjoy here,

and he drives on...

and beauty appears around every turn...

and they stand in awe of the God who created...

when long-haired bookworm daughter finds blackberries,
when she gasps as "the most beautiful butterfly i have ever seen"
flies by her

when they are together,
experiencing His glory in His creation,

no longer making good timing on the cramped, two day drive,
but not caring either,
because instead they are making good memories...


and creation seems to scream out,
HE who made you made me,
He who loves you crafted me for you,
so you can see beauty,
get a taste of the beauty that He is,
drink me in,
breathe me in, 
I am real...